Archive for love

What is Love?

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , on February 21, 2013 by gerrybartlett

I’ve always thought of February as the month for love. Valentine’s Day is in the middle of the month and I was married on the 26th, many years ago. I’ve talked before about my own marriage and you can read my love story in another part of this website. Recently Dear Abby answered a letter from a heartbroken reader who was trying to get over a failed romance. Abby had a good definition of what real love is and I’ll paraphrase it here. She said someone who loves you makes you feel strong instead of dependent. He or she appreciates you for the person you are and isn’t threatened by your successes. He or she supports you when you do well, celebrates your triumphs and hugs you after your tragedies. Sound familiar? I hope so. I know when I was struck by Cupid’s arrow, I was more interested in chemistry than those important things. Luckily, I was supported in every way. No one was more thrilled than my husband when I sold my first book. I was a young, immature girl when I met and married him. He helped me grow and change, encouraged me in every way. And the chemistry was good too.

It’s funny. I write romance because I love to read about that first meeting, the way two people connect and find the one person who makes them stronger, feel loved and cherished. I read those books long before I met a man who could do that for me. I was looking for a fantasy man. The reality was much different. There were money issues, the details of daily life that dragged at us. Men raised in the era John was didn’t understand shared chores in the home. I had to battle for every emptied dishwasher or trash run. Argh. Chemistry can only take you so far. Know what I mean? But if there’s more, the respect, the encouragement that Dear Abby was talking about, then you work through the daily grind and come out the other side. Raising children and living through lay-offs may make bedtime lose its magic for a while. But a hug at the right time, an empty dishwasher just when you needed it, can go a long way to helping you remember why you fell in love in the first place.

I write about vampires. Weird paranormal creatures. But the emotions are all human. Glory has been looking for true love ever since she found herself a widow in 1604. Yes, she has Jerry. But she doesn’t trust that bond. He’s too controlling, too protective. And she’s too insecure to believe that he won’t eventually tire of her. Yes, that’s crazy on her part. But insecurity isn’t always rational. So what if he’s stuck around for four hundred years. He could finally walk away. So she keeps looking around. Thinking maybe she should have other options. Wrong? Probably. I don’t know if you’re Team Jerry, Team Rafe or Team Ray. But I’ve always been Team Glory. She has to realize that she needs to relax and just see what happens if she believes in herself. There’s a lot to be said for loyalty. And chemistry. Glory needs to decide where she finds both.

So how did you meet your love? Or are you still looking? Comment here for a chance to win an autographed copy of my March 5 release, Real Vampires Know Hips Happen, and a $25 gift card to either Amazon or Barnes & Nobles. I’ll pick a lucky winner on that release day, March 5. Good luck! And I can’t wait to read your stories.

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