Why I Don’t Do Resolutions

I haven’t made New Year’s Resolutions since the turn of this century. Why? Because they never did anything for me but make me feel like a failure. They were always the same. You know the ones: Lose weight, eat healthy, start exercising, get more work done, take my vitamins, manage my money better. I could go on. It’s like airing all my dirty laundry.

Did I ever keep any of those resolutions? Of course not. Oh, I’d start off January with a bang, full of fervor and resolve. I’d join Weight Watchers, maybe Curves too. I’d even buy new workout clothes. Hit the grocery store after cleaning out my pantry of all those bad foods. Of course that did a number on that resolve to manage my money better. The vitamins? Well, some of them gave me indigestion. I can’t tell you how many practically full bottles went out of date, another waste of money. The working thing was another matter. I’m a writer. And a procrastinator. As usual I’d wait till a deadline loomed before I kept my butt in the chair. Some habits never change.

You see? By February I was usually down a couple of pounds and inches, but my bank account was hurting. And I was getting bored with my routine. My friends were tired of my tales of dieting drama too. And I was sick of myself. By March you’d find chips back in the pantry and candy on the counter. The monthly fee kept coming out of my checking account but I wasn’t hitting the Curves circuit. It took until June for me to admit I wasn’t going back. So much money wasted.

So after years of this cycle, I finally called it quits. No more resolutions. I’m all about goals now. And they have to be goals I can actually meet. Forget goals like “Sell a book.” I know you can’t make a publisher buy your book. But I can finish a proposal and submit it. I might set a goal to aim for thirty minutes of exercise of some kind, three times a week. Doable? I hope so. Knowing me, it would be more realistic to make it ten minutes, twice a week. I still have the wrapper on the Jane Fonda workout DVD I special ordered for last year. Sigh.

Okay, you see the truth here. I’m a slug, disorganized, and lost in my creative world. Somehow I do finish writing books and turning them in. It’s a miracle. I have found a new goal this year. Organize at least one part of my house a month. My sister-in-law attacked my silverware drawer at Christmas. I loved the result. Maybe I’ll go for my underwear drawer next.

Do you have some goals for the new year? Share here. Remember, they have to be something you can control. Nothing pie in the sky like win the lottery. Not unless you’ve figured out a way to rig it. If so, I’m your new best friend. Post here and I’ll pick one lucky commenter to win a gift bag of books, some from me, some signed copies from writer pals of mine. It’ll be a surprise but I have at least five here I can toss in plus a gift card to your favorite retail outlet. And it’ll help clear my clutter, another goal I should write down. Are you in? Let me hear from you by January 15 which means procrastinators beware. 
Happy New Year!

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101 Responses to “Why I Don’t Do Resolutions”

  1. Dianne Byrd Says:

    I want to find simple ways to “pay it forward” at least once a week.

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  2. Reading your list of resolutions made me chuckle, they are all the things I have said myself in the past. My one goal for the year, the one thing I have thought about for the last half of this year and that I want to make a reality in 2013 is to learn to scubba dive.

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  3. I have a few goals for this year. 1) is to improve my health. I just left the ER this evening and apparently I am having tummy spasms and high blood pressure. 2)is to visit my father more. I don’t see him enough and he isn’t doing well. 3) is to do something in the community to help kids deal with bullying. My boss’s daughter took her life 12/23 due to bullying. It would be nice to help some kids in the community. 4) is to be as happy as possible in all situations. I hope those are all obtainable goals for 2013!!!
    Happy New Year everyone!!!!

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  4. Maria Denmark Says:

    I agree with Dianne – paying it forward! 🙂 I have a bunch of friends who did “acts of kindness” for Christmas, but I’d like to continue it all year long.

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  5. Resolutions. Heck, this year, I have no resolutions. I just want to find a way to do more than barely survive. I want to get my family to take me seriously and not try and stuff me in a Section 8 apartment and forget about me like they are trying to do. Okay, my one goal, get divorced and take back my maiden name. I hope I get my home in the divorce. Not like he can use it where he is.

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  6. Katie Gurrieri Says:

    I posted a few goals that I’m going to shoot for on my Facebook. They were to lose 40 pounds in this coming year, which I believe is doable, I’ve been hitting the gym for the past 2 months at least 3-4 times a week. The other one is to read 50 books. I probably have 10 that I know of in my house that I haven’t read, that are new to me. I tend to buy the first book of a series, and when I am able to start it, the newest book of a different series that I’m reading is out… lol So the books I bought with the intentions of reading, have been sitting on the back burner… So 2013 is the perfect year for me to pick them up and read them!

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  7. I have actually declared to myself that 2013 is the year of goals! I posted a little while ago. I have already begun my no buy. ..

    Lose 16 kg’s and maintain the weight loss whilst being fit and healthy through a combination of regular exercise, social classes and walks, and many clean eating meals! Read and log or review 100 books or stories (as I read a large number of fanfic’s that are over 60,000 words in length) – I read a LOT but never seem to be able to remember what’s next or exactly how many things I’ve read. On a similar note, I’d like to keep track of what movies I’m watching and what TV shows I follow or have seen. Blog at least twice a week on a schedule – and film at least one YouTube video a month (this makes it hopefully an easier goal to achieve as all I need to do is film an Empties/Favorites video every month!) whilst continuing to “network” with like-minded individuals. I’d also like to incorporate “regular” themes into my blogging such as “Manic Monday” or “Friday Favourites” type posts. Write a full and detailed Bucket List of things I’d like to complete before I turn 30! (I turn 24 two day’s before Valentine’s Day in 2014.) Don’t upgrade my mobile phone or tablet until March 2014! [Barring lost or stolen, ruined or faulty devices, this should be just a matter of willpower… eek!] I seem to constantly be on the lookout for the greatest and latest technology upgrades – this needs to stop! Make this a “No-Buy Year” and cut down on my cosmetic consumerism and shopaholic tendencies. Complete my BioSculpture Gel Nail course and become an accredited nail technician. Do a complete and utter digital de-clutter. Basically, go as paperless as possible. Pay for and plan an overseas cruise to go on in 2014. Venture into red-headed goodness (think Kaylee DeFer when she first appeared on Gossip Girl with a bit of ginger-nut happening up top). Complete at least one Instagram photo-a-day challenge! Reach some kind of Royal status with selling Senegence makeup. SAVE money! Pay off as much of my debt as possible using 36% of my income.

    Maybe I have “HAS” (as per the movie Parental Guidance) but it will be a great year regardless!

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    • Dare I say, “Calm down.”? Sweetie, you are way too serious and putting too much pressure on yourself. I’m exhausted just reading your list. If you do just a quarter of this, I’d be amazed. Pick one thing and do it. Then go on to the next. Good luck. And happy New Year!

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  8. Nicole Mares Says:

    It’s so nice to hear there is someone else out there that procrastinates! I have never been able to keep a new year resolution and my best college papers are written the night before:). I’m surrounded by people who make exercise commitments and keep them and I’m just sitting on my couch, watching the Carmen Electra workout DVD ( while eating ice cream and yelling “NO!” at the instructor every time he tells me to do something). Thank you it’s great to know I’m not alone.

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    • You’re hilarious, Nicole. That tops my still shrink-wrapped DVDs. I did walk the mall this morning. Yay! We’ll see how long that lasts. We could start a procrastinators club but who’d show up to get the ball rolling? We’d keep putting off the start date. Right?

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  9. My goals are to finish my book that I’m working on and remember to add more fun to my schedule. I’ve been so focused on my day time job and writing everything else has been put on hold, even the beautiful books on my to be read list.

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  10. Julie Randolph Says:

    Don’t die in the Mayan Apocalypse …wait, did that. Sweet. I’m done.

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  11. I’m like you Gerry, I make all kinds of resolutions with great intentions but never really get any done. I think this year, I will just try to do my best in whatever I attempt. I have to get my health under control first and foremost which isn’t easy with Lupus and other health issues, but I have to give it my all. I do want to read more, I love to and it gets me out of life that is stressful and into another world that I can just enjoy! Of course weight is always an issue with me and tough to lose with all the meds I take, but I think I will start with trying to lose 10 pounds and go from there. Hope you and yours have a wonderful new year!

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  12. I do not make resolutions, even though I am “fluffy”, I will not diet. I will not swear to stop smoking. I am fluffy, I have vices, I am but a simple woman with flaws. In this New Year, I am committed to working on my relationship with my wonderful husband. You see, we find ourselves empty nesters. Our daughter got married on the 15 of this December 2012 in a lovely ceremony at our church. We find ourselves learning to talk to each other again. We will have date nights and we will make fun weekend trips! In essence, we are finding each other again! Thirty years together has been a Blessing!! This New year of 2013 is going to be a wonderful new chapter in our lives!

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  13. This past year, my Goodreads goal for 2012 was 100 books. I made it to 89. 😦 I know that 100 is doable since I didn’t join the challange until Mayish. And 100 is my goal for 2013. Also, to go to Florida since I have lived in Mississippi for almost 7 years and have NEVER been. Too close to have not already been kicked off my bucket list! (PS – I don’t do New Year’s Resolutions either. Each birthday, I create a Birthday Bucket List with the about of items for how many years I turned. Some of it is small, like make Pot Pies in my Crockpot – but they are small, reachable goals – and it keeps me motivated all year!) Have a great new year, and I cannot wait for Glory’s new book or to hear you announce that I won! 🙂 (One goal this year – positive thinking!!!)

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  14. My husband and I have made a resolution together. We are changing our eating habits to a healthier lifestyle. Wenagreednto only have the yummy desserts on special occasions. I just hope we don’t make every day a special occasion. Another resolution is to paint my nails with my little girl more. Gotta face it, she is growing up fast and I should have more of those girly moments with her.

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    • Lucky you to have a little girl. I just had a boy but we had our moments. I am in love with silver nail polish these days. Try it. She’ll love it too. Desserts? I try never to order them in restaurants. It saves me money too.

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  15. This is how I feel about New Year’s resolutions also! Thank you for putting this on here! I feel so much better about not being able to fullfill my new year’s resolutions too! I’m glad I’m not the only one! … On lighter note, I did download Real Vampires Don’t Wear Skinny Jeans last night to my Kindle. Another winner in my book! 🙂
    Happy New Year Gerry!

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  16. I honestly can’t remember the last time I made a resolution and I quit for the same reasons that you listed. I hated feeling like I had failed and I was tired of getting teased about not sticking to it. My main goals are 1) Lose at least 10 pounds, but I would prefer to lose more. 2) Get more organized. 3) Market my Cake business to have more orders. 4) Work on me! (I wear sweats, pants and shorts, about 99% of the time and I would like to improve how I dress etc.) 5) My husband got a new job and he’s making more money so our goal is to start saving for our 1st vacation in a decade! We want to take our boys to Disney!

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  17. I’m not making my usual lose weight resolution this year, either. I’ll work on it, but going to try a new approach of not putting massive amounts of pressure on myself. We’ll see how it goes. 🙂 My resolution this year is to be better with money management.

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  18. Every year I make a resolution to lose weight. No more. I want to learn to love me for me, just work on being healthy. Also, I finished college last year after many years of trying and I plan to put that to use and start a career doing something I love. Finally, read and write. I have a pile a mile high of books to get through plus one of my own I never finished.

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  19. I also have goals for the year! I want to finish losing this last 20 lbs (lost 75 lbs so far!) I want to run a 5K race in under 30 minutes even if it is 29:59, and I want to conquer a 10K this year. I have some financial goals I will be working toward this year as well.

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  20. colleen stram Says:

    I started my new year resolution by letting my ex have our boys over night on xmas eve. I am supposed to have them every year but, my boys need to experience that over at their dads. It broke my heart because xmas is my most fav holiday. But in the season of giveing I let them go. As for other resolutions, I never fall thru but I will try and be the best single mom I can be and to make sure my boys are happy. HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!

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  21. Tanya Moser Says:

    I don’t necessarily like to make resolutions I feel like they never work but I do want to and have been working on a few things that have been problems for me, first and foremost being my health I am a young mom and I want to be around for my kids for a long time also I tend to be a little bit (ok a lot don’t judge me) of a shopaholic if I want to keep my status as a stay at home mom I really need to work on this one… and last but not least I want to be DONE with diapers by 2014!!!

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  22. Oddly enough I would like to gain weight this year as opposed to losing it. My husband and I have the resolution to try for a baby. We have always wanted children and after three years together we are hoping for a miracle this year.

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  23. I have no New Year’s resolution, I try to remind myself daily not yearly to be the best ME I can be. My goal last year was to take our first family vacation. I am happy to say we just got home from Cocoa Beach Fl. This year I plan on focusing more on making memories and being thankful for not only what I already have but celebrating every good thing that comes along not only for me but for my family and friends also. Taking time to really enjoy all that life gives us. Cars, homes, jobs, things in general all come and go through our lives. What we will always have is each other and the memories of these days. My goal is to be in the moments and not wasting it while looking for the next.

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  24. Kathryn Kitchens Says:

    I have also resolved to not give resolutions anymore. This year I move forward as being strong enough to end an abusive relationship spanning 24 years. I am ready to forge ahead, continue to have a great relationship with my special needs son and just see what the year holds for me. This year was the worst emotionally and that, in turn took a medical toll on me. Get this, my doctor has faith that half of my ailments will correct themselves once my relationship issues resolve. Day by day is tough, no lie, but I am open to anything and everything this year. I am back in school and bought my own car (by myself) this year and bought myself a Kindle for Christmas!! Woo-hoo!! Lookout new year! Here I come!! LOL!! Goals are good and I procrastinate as well. Sometimes, that’s when you turn out your best work…don’t you agree?

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  25. I have simple goals for this year. My goal is to designing a serenity garden in my back yard. My second goal will be two in one. I plan on using the local library more. By using the library I will be saving money. In the last few years I have over spent purchasing books. I have become a book hoarder.

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  26. Stephanie Russell Says:

    I understand about new years resolutions. But it’s fun to see what you can keep. The one I want to do is read more. Especially about Glory!

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    • Yes, I’ve had trouble fitting in reading time lately too. Glory and I are spending too much time together.

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      • The more time you spend with Glory the more time we will so you will never convice a fan that you’re too busy

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      • Sometimes we spread ourselves too thin doing stuff we can put off. I stick housecleaning in that category. Did get most Christmas stuff put away but then I really wanted to finish writing the next Glory book so there is still a red tablecloth on my dining room table. Sigh. It will get done eventually. No one cares but me. Besides, busy is good. It keeps my mind active. I think of story ideas at the oddest time. Like when I’m driving on the freeway. 😉

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  27. To take my son to the YMCA at least once a week, not including swim lessons. He’s 10 now and is allowed to use some of the gym equipment and he loves it. When we are there he’s a great motivator. So we need to go and work out together at least once a week.
    I’m so tired after work, my job is very physical (some days it’s like a all day treadmill/weightlifting session) and it’s hard to squeeze the gym in between that my son’s homework, cello practice and basketball practice. Weekends are busy with basketball games and swim lessons. I’d rather just spend my time curled up with a book! But I feel like I should make “working out” a normal part of day to day or at least week to week necessary activities so my son grows up with at least 1 good habit. We’ll tackle some more over the coming years.

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    • Sounds like a busy schedule. I hope you ask your son if he wants to be in all of those activities. He might enjoy some quiet time too. Just a thought.

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      • His schedule is not busy, my work schedule is, and being a 100% single parent is, makes it hard to get it all done.
        Cello is a part of his school day, he’s in the school orchestra, practice is at home along with homework(A student no troubles there :)). 1 hour a week is bball practice 1 hour is the game and 1 hour of swimming. So only 3 hours of this is outside of school a week. Not much at all. He wishes to be in other things as well but I can not afford the fees and I do not have the time to get him to the other places. When he’s done with bball for the season I let him pick one of the other things to do once a week, like a pottery, writing or acting class.
        Trust me, I would NEVER put my kid activities he didn’t want to be in. He has to make the choice of what to pick and what to pass on. Taking him to the Y once week is the start he needs to make sure he doesn’t develop all the sit on my butt lazy habits I have. If he had it his way we’d go everyday.

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      • You sound like a wonderful mom. He’s so lucky to have you. My friend staying with me right now went through that and told me how hard it is to juggle everything. Just take care of yourself when you can squeeze in the time, Shelli! Rock on.

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  28. Melody Jarrells Says:

    I am really hoping to start full time teaching this year. I want to get a home for my family and I want to get my hypothyroidism under better control. I want to laugh more and be happy. Happy New Year! Looking forward to March!

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  29. Mine are easy, I wish to
    Smile more, laugh more, cry more, dream more, swear more, breath deeper.

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  30. I plan to walk my dogs more and eat healthier. I hope to get into the respiratory therapy program at school in the new year.

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  31. phumphrey79@gmail.com Says:

    Gerry like you I need to declutter. I try not to make resolutions but this coming year I really want to have a yard sale to get rid of mostly clothes that I have hung on to with the hopes of getting back to that size after my twins were born. And A bunch of baby stuff because I thought of having more but my two are enough for me to handle. So that is a reachable resolution for me. Happy New Year!!

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  32. A year and a half ago I joined Weight Watchers for the third time…this time I have stuck it out and am down…wait for it…90 pounds! So the first resolution for this year is to lose the remaining 20 pounds to get to goal. Secondly, I lost my job last January 3rd. Rather than dwell on it, I decided along withthe weight loss I needed to change myself, so I went back to school online. I am now 5 classes into my masters! So resolution number 2 is to continue plugging away at that. I am 9 classes away from completing the masters. I finally got hired and start on January 7th, so my third resolution is to keep up the good stuff I started while off work, this year once I start back to work!!!

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  33. Dawna Preston Says:

    wow 2013

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  34. Lisa Partridge Says:

    My New Years Resolution is to try to be kinder to myself and to try not take stock of my life. I also plan to read lots of great novels! I wish we didn’t have to wait until March for the next Glory novel. Love you lots Gerry! Thanks for being a writer and bringing us this world.

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  35. Belinda Mondagarian Says:

    Several years back I bought some Christmas cards that simply said to be happy with what you have, appreciate the ones you love, care about the ones without and work on making the magic of Christmas last with you throughout the year. Since that year I have not made a resolution but instead vowed to be kind, caring, compassionate and live everyday as if it were Christmas. So far I seem to be doing pretty good, I could do better. Every year I add more to what I should do and try and influence my grandchildren to do the same. Resolutions are never kept, a vow to yourself just may be. Happy New Year everyone!!

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    • Nice, Belinda. I really do hope to meet you someday. I’m working next Saturday but not any more in January. My friends in the shop know I have writing deadlines. You sound like someone I’d enjoy visiting with. 😉

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  36. 2012 brought me a lifestyle change, my main goal is to stay on track, I have lost 58lbs so far, I am looking to continue the trend and become a healthier person. I am also tryin to be a better me. Paying it forward, random acts of kindness.. and simple gestures to make someone smile. Lifestyle Changes of the body and mind. xo

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  37. My goal is to get a job. I left work in 2006 to be a mother, three beautiful kids later I feel like all I’m good for is cooking dinner and telling bedtime stories. But the kids are in school and my man got laid off two weeks before christmas and I hate feeling like trash claiming government handouts so I would like to get back in to work and support my family by doing more than just cook and clean.

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    • I hope you realize how important raising those kids is. Hugs on the job thing. I know it’s tough right now. I hope your guy has luck in his job hunt too. May 2013 by a better year for all of you.

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      • I just thought I’d put an update. I qualified as a security guard last week and start working nights at a local supermarket in two weeks. I’ll be able to get the kids from school, make them dinner and put them to bed before I go to work. Their dad will get the morning shift taking them to school. My babies are my world and now I get to buy them what they need knowing I got the money for it instead of just charging the card. I feel better than I have in years and wish luck to anyone else struggling to find a job, hang in there because it feels great to achive it.

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    • Vicky,
      How great that you got the new job and it works with your schedule. I’m thrilled for you and your family. Take care.
      Gerry

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  38. Beverley Reznor Says:

    Hi Gerri –

    I have to admit – I spent most of the time reading this blog with a smile! Most of what you wrote Could have been written by ME! That being said – as with many others agreeing – we can know that we are not alone in our struggles… Like yourself – I am a super procrastinator….. Its with the deadline breathing down my neck that I too will get my tail glued to the chair…. (with beads of sweat on the forehead!)

    Anyhow, for this year – I am going to focus more on connecting with myself and becoming more grounded. Take more time to notice things around me – instead of flying through everything with my head in the clouds….

    Lastly – perhaps to some of those looking to lose some weight, try not eating carbs past 3pm…. Have that sandwich, bowl of pasta, rice dish prior to 3pm and then have something light so your system can digest for the rest of the day. It actually works… You don’t deprive yourself of foods that are craved (face it – who wants to just eat salad and meat all the time?) and lose some weight.

    Good luck everyone!

    And take care Gerri – Best wishes for 2013 🙂

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    • No carbs after 3? Sounds worth a try. My head is usually in my book and no telling what I miss going on around me. Yes, I need to pay more attention to what’s going on around me. Good goals!

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  39. Sonya Perricone Says:

    I myself have never made New Years resolutions. This year I will strive harder to make my goals though. Which is my first goal! I am also going to finish my family tree. I want to make it to Cherryvale, Ks to visit my mothers grave for the first time since she died in 2008. I have yet to even see her headstone. I am going to work harder towards finding a way to open at least my catering business. And last but not least I am going to work on finishing my book instead of giving up after 2 chapters and maybe even start a cookbook. I may never get them published but if I at least finish them I’ll have accomplished something!

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    • Good luck with all of that, Sonya. I’m not big on visiting gravesites myself. I know I carry their spirit around with me. The grave is just where the body lies. But it is nice to connect with them there occasionally. Sad, but a special time. Take care.

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  40. René Corbin Says:

    Honestly, I would never stick to resolutions I made. But I like the goals idea. My goal this year is to find a balance in life. I am starting anew from a failed marriage and want to pursue things that really matter to me. I am looking into careers that will make me happy (and support my kids). I just don’t want to settle anymore. I can have my work, my kid time, and time for me. It is all about learning to balance.

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    • The balancing act is tough. I wish you luck. First is deciding what you really want. That takes slowing down long enough to listen to your inner voice. I know that’s always been the hardest thing for me. May 2013 bring you everything you need.

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  41. cindy carroll Says:

    My goals for the year are to get more organized. I plan to tackle one room per week and get it completely clean and organized. I also plan to eat healthier this year, not necessarily a diet, but if I lose some weight in the process, it definitely wouldn’t hurt.

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    • Ah, organization. When you get through with your house, come over here. It’s so frustrating when you can’t find what you’re looking for. That’s the real pain of being disorganized. Good luck! If you discover secrets of staying that way, let me know.

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  42. Shannon Cahill Says:

    My resolution this year is to get my house clean and keep t that way. I am working on dejunking one area at a time. For example, cleaning my desk took 3 hours. This is due in large part to the fact that my children end to drop things where ever they are when they are done with them and my husband’s idea of picking up is to grab everything in his way and put it on my desk, lol! The kitchen is next. If I’m really really good, i may get to the basement by May or so 🙂

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    • It’s tough when you don’t get cooperation. You might try giving them each a basket for their things. Dropped stuff goes in the basket and they take it to their room. At least it’s out of the common areas. When they are missing things, they can look in the basket. My son had to dig in the bottom of his frequently to find stuff he needed. But that was his filing system until he married a super organized woman. You wouldn’t believe how he’s changed. I realized I was letting him get away with being messy. She doesn’t. Sigh.

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  43. My goal for the year is to travel more. Ended last year with one family trip, of the many I’d like to take, checked off the list. I hope to check off at least three this year. I’ve already started looking at the best times to visit and creating itineraries for our time there. Once that is settled, I will get working on booking them. Life is too short to spend it wondering what things might have been like. I don’t plan to waste anymore of my time doing that.

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    • I love to travel and it’s so educational for kids. I was lucky my parents took my brother and I with them on lots of great trips when we were young. I will never forget them. Seeing other cultures is great. Or just other states. Go for it!

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  44. I have always had a laundry list of resolutions for myself just like you. However, this year my only “resolution” is to read more. Admittedly I have to catch up on what’s going on with Glory and a few other characters from other series I’ve started. So this year my goal is to read at least 30 books. Also with having recently moved I’ve got to get my library back in order. I can’t stand not having my books in their right place on the shelf.

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  45. I thought quite a bit about the new year & my goals for it. I had lap-band surgery last year so I knew I wanted to have a weight loss goal. I am going back to school this year so I knew I wanted to have a succeed in all of my classes at all costs goal. I was married to my darling husband Adam less than 3 months ago so I knew I wanted to have some sort of goal about being the best wife ever. I recently lost my job so I knew I wanted to have some sort of upward momentum employment goal. I started to feel overwhelmed just thinking about it and then I realized that it doesn’t matter. I live with chronic pain disorder every day. Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy is painful and surgery didn’t help it only made it worse. So I learned to look at your daily goals, affirmations, and mountains. I am still learning to give myself credit for conquering the mole hills that I made into mountains on a daily basis. I am BLESSED. I have a wonderful husband who loves me and chose to marry me knowing all that he knows (He does know it ALL!). I have the support I need to finish school & find a new job. I have lost almost 100 pounds since I had surgery so I think the weight is taking care of itself with the help of my band. What momentous goal did that leave me with? Be the best wife I can be.. That is the one goal I will push to achieve. I married the greatest man that I never hoped for because I didn’t know that men like him even existed. He is beauty personified when I watch him sleep in the morning. He is laughter over flowing when he tells me something funny. He is my spouse, partner, and lover. I am so lucky to him and my one goal is to continuously modulate towards being the best wife I can. Because he will be that support that I need to finish school, he is the cheerleader I need to help me stay on my path to continue my weight loss, he is the wonderful man who would sit up late stuffing resumes in envelopes, and he is my fantastic husband who deserves to have a wife who cares enough to try for the best in everything she does including her marriage. So in short Gerry (LOL). I chose my big goal to be my push to be a better wife. Because I know that he will be the coach I need in my corner when I face down all of those other things.. I hope 2013 is fabulous for you Gerry!!! I love your books ❤

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    • Wow! You certainly have a lot going on. I admire you for all you have gone through and have ahead of you. And, yes, you are blessed to have found a life partner to go with you on your journey. I will tell you this: quit pressuring yourself with that be the best wife stuff. He’s a lucky guy too. He recognizes the fact that he found a strong woman who has a will to succeed and a loving heart. Be yourself and he will be the one blessed. Relax and enjoy these years of early marriage. Trust me, they are some of the best. Yes, there are struggles, but new love makes them easier. Take care of yourself first and you’ll have more to give others.

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  46. I, like you, have given up the resolution thing. I am trying the “goals” road! I also am not letting anyone know (except you Gerry!) that I have these things in mind. One of my goals is to do the things around my house that I have been putting off since moving here. So far,this week I have completed at least 3. I also want to get the mammogram that I have been putting off for about 3 years too long and get back to the endocrinologist for another problem. I am just horrible for putting off my own health issues. I also have a huge goal for letting my kids take more responsibility for themselves. I have more goals in mind but I can only do so much…..right????? Thanks for this opportunity Gerry. Not just the contest but to see that others out there are like me!!!!

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    • I am the queen of putting things off. But not the mammogram. I do that for myself every year. I’ve had friends and family members die of breast cancer so I take no chances. I want to be here for a loooong time. Don’t you? And I have that nasty writer’s imagination. Better to know I’m all right than to imagine I’ve got a problem. One thing at a time though. You are so right.

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      • Normally I am right on top of the doctor appointments, testing, mammograms, etc., but for some reason I have just not made that appointment. Oh, yes, I want to be around and healthy for a very very long time! I also have lost a best fried to breast cancer. I thank you for the kick in the butt. I will schedule on Monday. Sometimes it takes a friendly kick to make you realize what you are doing wrong! ❤

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